Baby J Bday Eve

Hanukkah Snake

Berkley, or "Berkie," is an adorable red-tailed Colombian boa constrictor. He travels around in N's pocket, whether across town on the subway or across the world on transcontinental flights. He is only a few months old now, but will eventually grow up to 11 feet.

A Comparative Study of Phone Music at Asian Missions to the World Trade Organization

One can learn a lot about a country from the music it plays to you while you are on hold with their diplomatic representatives.

Cambodia: Mountain woodwinds. I am soothed.

Japan: New Jersey mall Christmas carols.

Korea: What you would hear in an Asian hotel elevator c. 1987. Saxophones, gongs.

Malaysia: Razzmatazz show tunes.

Singapore: No music. Natch.

Taiwan: HORRID high pitched whistling such as a toy keyboard might play. Off key. My ears bleed.

Thailand: Romantic French crooning.

Vietnam: No 'hold' function. Phone is placed on desk while the interlocutor seeks someone else to deal with me, or is passed hand-to-hand around the one room of the mission. Much shouting in Vietnamese. Hanoi street market.

In which I bang on for pages and pages and thus doing save the world

Read it. I'm talking to you.