New Orleans

Last weekend the Kweilats and I blew like a hurricane through a swamp of sin masquerading as a Third World city dressed up in French/Spanish colonial and Southern American trappings. I have no idea how D or anyone else manages to live there, such is the hedonism, the dysfunction, the absurdity. Obviously it was an amazing 72 hours. I was lucky to leave alive.

A full account is beyond my powers. So, some vignettes:

1) Arrive sometime after 2am. D fails to meet us at the airport, having nodded off. Take a 'taxi' driven by grandmotherly figure with little sense of driving / New Orleans geography. Stops car at one point to "put in her eyes" so as to see map proffered by W on iphone.

2) First day walk through French Quarter. By 1:30 have eaten 4-5 meals, mostly oyster-based, often fried. Discover lax open container laws, which even extend to drive-throughs. Spend rest of day in this position, absorbing radiant sunshine.



3. Food. Flavors: More Caribbean than anything, less zesty than anticipated. Ingredients: Pork, cream, the fattier mollusks, sugar, lard. Technique: Old-school French meets deep-fryer. Portion size: Texan. Gorged until ill.

4. Swamp tour. Got in a large aluminum boat driven by wiley cajun to look at alligators. Wished we could throw horrid, horrid Canadian tourists overboard. Decided to get small pet for D.

5. Unbeknownst to us, the mardi gras festivities had begun! Most parades are in the respectable Garden District, and are pleasant, family-friendly affairs. One parade, organized by the Krewe de Vieux, goes through the French Quarter and is a bit more outre. Guess which one was going on last Saturday. This year's theme: Stimulus Package. We acquired many beads at the cost of only small levels of dignity.

This float depicts the relationship between subprime mortgage lender Fannie Mae and Uncle Sam:

Sperm on parade:

A newly impovershed reveler:

6. General merriment
7: You can learn a lot about a city from its signs.

Friendly:

Cannibalistic:
Enthusiastic:

Practical:
Equal opportunity:

Mysterious:
Scary:

Saturated (yes, it's a real one):


Still trying to wrap my head around it all. I will definitely need a repeat visit.